Well, No Home Birth For Me


24-wks-prego-baby-3-medium

Well, here I am, six months along.

My Jada took the picture for me 🙂

From the beginning of this pregnancy I’ve been intrigued by the idea of having a home birth. Reading other people’s home birthing stories has been so inspiring too. With this being #3 for us, I feel like I know what to expect now, and would feel comfortable delivering in my home (plus we have a huge garden tub that would be perfect!). So, when I went to my doctor’s office for a checkup I took the opportunity to speak with a midwife.

When I told her that I was interested in doing a home birth she looked surprised. Knowing where we live, she cautioned that if there was an emergency we would be too far from the hospital to get help. The hospital is about 30 min. from here, and she strongly encouraged other options.

The nearest birthing center is 2 hours away, and our local hospital does not allow midwives to practice. So… my options weren’t looking so great. She told me that some women choose to rent a hotel room close to the hospital to deliver in. That didn’t sound very appealing.

She also told me that the next nearest hospital, about 45 min. to an hour away, does allow midwives. She lowered her voice and let me in on her secret; on the weekends she is a midwife on call at this other hospital. She has been trying to get our local hospital to allow midwives, but has so far been unsuccessful. So, she practices there on the down low.

I think this is my best option. I’ll have to transfer to another practice for the remainder of the pregnancy, but she told me that’s no big deal, patients do it all the time.

I really wish I could just have my baby at home. Do you know how nice that would be?? No pushy nurses coming into the room at all hours of the night, checking on you or baby. Nobody trying to take baby away for testing or shots or who knows what else. No chances of a hospital “accident”, or having to worry about somebody taking your baby.

Just the peace and comfort of my own home. Ahhh, but it’s only a dream.

I asked the midwife if I could leave right after having the baby, or if I would have to stay. She told me they will keep me for at least 12 hours, just to keep a check on the baby.

I’m going to be a more difficult patient this time around. I do not want them taking baby out of my sight. I do not want them giving baby any kinds of shots or vaccines. I do not want them shoving that horrible long tube down baby’s throat to suck all of the fluids out. And I wanna get out of there ASAP!

Boy, I hope I don’t have too much trouble.

And now I’m going to have to find somebody to watch my other two when I go into labor. What if it’s in the middle of the night? I hate to have to wake them up and drive them somewhere. I’m not sure what I’m going to do.

See, if I could have baby at home I could just deliver here without ever having to wake the kids.

But it’s too risky. If something were to go wrong I’d regret that decision for the rest of my life. I won’t risk my baby’s life for my own convenience and comfort.

Oh well. I guess delivering in a hospital with a midwife is a good alternative. And it is nice knowing that if there was a problem, the doc’s would be right there to jump in.

So, looks like I don’t have an option. No home birth for me. I just pray that delivery goes well, and my wishes aren’t resisted.

**Update: What a blessing! I was able to find a midwife after all. Read all about it here!


Kendra
About Kendra 1103 Articles
A city girl learning to homestead on an acre of land in the country. Wife and homeschooling mother of four. Enjoying life, and everything that has to do with self sufficient living.

15 Comments

  1. I would research a bit further. It sounds like you have been exposed to a rather conservative midwife. I wonder if she even attends homebirths? If not her philosophies are going to be very hospital and hospital rule leaning.

    I have had two home births, both babies over 10lbs. There are almost never problems because a labor goes too fast. If there is a problem, it naturally slows down, giving you ample time to get to a hospital.

    Here is a graphic but realistic comparison of home vs hospital birth. Having a baby in a hospital is about as easy and comfortable as having a bowel movement on a table, with assistance from multiple strangers and “experts”, compared to using your own bathroom in the privacy of your home. The biggest relief being the lack of fear of whatever interventions the rules or whims of medicine may bring when you are there. The next biggest thing would be that eating whenever you like tends to have a very positive effect on pain tolerance. It is just so much better in so many ways I can’t describe.

    Babies born with problems often seem to have had difficulty arriving, (very long labors). Frankly I suspect that is how God intends it to be. Some babies that are saved in hospitals wouldn’t survive a normal delivery and perhaps were not supposed to. Having had a home miscarriage as well, I am glad the Lord had it all under control.

  2. Hi Kendra,

    Sorry to hear you can’t have the homebirth you were hoping for. I had my son in September with a midwife in a hospital 20mins away. In the end there were complications and I tore horribly.. I was glad to be in a hospital. My midwife handled everything with grace and calmness, she was fantastic. It was obvious the hospital staff respected her and for the majority of the time it was just her, my husband and me in the labour room. In the end they discharged me after 10 hours of giving birth. It would have been earlier but I was enjoying my sleep! My midwives work as a team and one of them lives 10 houses away. She came to my house at all hours to help me breast feed successfully. I hope your midwife experience was as good as mine. I can’t wait to have another one with them!

  3. I forgot to mention my oldest was planned to be a homebirth – and of all of my nieces and nephews (by families – 12 + 2 + 4 + 1) – only that final one was a planned hospital birth and another C-section. Every one of the others were planned homebirths. My mom is now training to be a midwife assistant, and helped deliver 6 of her grandchildren and 2 of my best friends babies – one of which would have been a C-section if she had gone to the hospital because he was 10lbs and had / has a BIG head.

  4. We are now preparing for my 3rd homebirth – all VBACs. We are 15 minutes from the small hospital that doesn’t do babies – and 35 minutes from the one that does. I’ll be 42 this time. After the hospital experience 14 years ago which caused the C-Section in the first place, I have had 1 rough birth almost 12 years ago and my son was born almost 4 years ago and it was nearly perfect. We are expecting again late September/early October. After long and extensive research while pregnant with my son – I’m convinced homebirths are, for healthy normal pregnancies and even for most low risk moms, far safer than a hospital birth. Of course that is just my opinion. There is an article on mercola.com about the safety of homebirths – his search feature should pull it right up.

  5. Hi Kendra!

    You look great in the picture. 🙂

    I have 4 kids and have given birth to all of them at home with midwives. I can’t tell you in appropriate words what wonderful spiritual experiences they turn out to be.:) You really come to find out what your body is capable of when you allow for it to do what it was created to do.

    Once, I was in the middle of delivering my son and my body stopped because it just knew something was wrong. I told the midwife to check because there was something wrong. Sure enough the cord was wrapped around the baby’s neck. She flipped the cord over his head and then, WHOOSH! Out he came with no harm done. He’s a healthy and lively 6 year old today.

    People have often wondered how is it that a woman can have great health and be able to get up and walk around aftering deliverying a baby. I tell them you prepare for the birth as soon as you find out you’re expecting. I would be sure to drink plenty of distilled water or some kind of filtered water each day. I drank red raspberry leaf tea 2 or 3 times a day. I took a natural form of calcium supplement and vitamins and mineralers and at least one iron tablet a day. Eat right! Eating lots of fresh fruits and veggies help tremendously to regulate your blood. Avoid sodas like the plague as well as a lot of sugary treats. I don’t see a problem with an occasional treat, but if over done it can harm you and your baby’s health. Plus, since I have a problem at birthing with my cervex swelling during labor, I would apply wheat germ oil on the cervex. But not after you’re 7 months pregnant. After all that, my labors are short and deliveries very fast. I actually look forward to births.:)

    God bless you sweetie! You’re about to welcome a presious child of God into the world. Giving birth really is a labor of love. And as I would always say,”A new born baby is God’s opinion that the world must go on.”

    I’m sure you’ll do fine. Listen to your body and not doctors. You’ll know what to do.

    Siska

  6. Hi! I’ve been reading your blog for a while and am finding it very helpful as we are attempting to become more self-sufficient. Just wanted to let you know that I have had a homebirth for both of our children and we are at least 30 minutes, if not more, from a hospital. Of course you have to make the choice that is best for you, but just wanted to add my two censt:)

  7. I just happened along to your blog as it came up on my Google Alerts… You do realize that there is not medical indication 9that you mention) that precludes you from having a safe homebirth attended by a trained midwife? I am one, and attend births all the time that are mroe than 30 minutes from a hospital. Most are 45 minutes, and I assure you that a well-trained midwife can spot trouble with plenty of time to get you to a hospital that is 30 minutes from your house.

    If homebirth is something you truly want, then I would investigate this further. The ACOG, (the organization overseeing obstetricians and gynecolgoists in this country) are notoritously ruthless about discouraging homebirths, depsite the data that proves it’s safety.

    Good luck, and best wishes!

  8. I am enjoying your blog, and you look great. Here is a great birth plan written for the hospital, but by a very “crunchy” mom. It may give you some ideas. I delivered my third child in a birth center in Feb and it was so peaceful…and the best part was going home after 3 hours!

    Best wishes,
    Christy

  9. Hi Kendra!

    I’m sorry your home birth didn’t work out, but at least you’re getting the oppertunity to work with a midwife!

    I’m far, far off from any children, but home birthing / having a midwife is a route I’m sure to go. Too many things can happen in a hospital.

    You look great, and I’m glad things are going well for y’all!

    God bless y’all & have a WONDERFUL Easter!!

  10. I delivered my third child with a midwife at a hospital. It was AWESOME!!!!! I would totally recommend a midwife over a doc any day! She was with me the entire time except to change into scrubs and to sign some papers. Oh I loved it! Email if you have any questions.

  11. I’m sorry that homebirth looks to be out of the question. 🙁 I hope the birth goes the way you want it & it’s fast & easy & you get to go home quickly!

  12. You’re looking great girl! I don’t blame you for not wanting to take any chances. I hope you’ll have a smooth delivery and be able to come home as soon as possible.

    Just a quick question. I signed up on the Gravatar site a long time ago and it works on other sites, but not yours. Is there something I’m not doing right?

    Happy Easter!

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