To Encourage A Young Mother


If you’ve ever tried it, you know… being a stay at home mom is hard work! (Case in point, at this very moment I am struggling to type out this post as my 2 year old is literally hanging on my arm!) You’ve never multi-tasked so much in your life!

Sometimes it can get discouraging. We have such high expectations of ourselves, and so many things to get done in a day. Some days we look around our disheveled home and feel like we have accomplished nothing.

You know, those days: by the time the evening has rolled around, there is laundry still piled up on the couch (or strewn all over the living room floor), dirty dishes spilling out of the sink and cluttering the counter top, the bathroom trash can is overflowing with dirty diapers, toys are everywhere, crumbs are all over the kitchen floor, and you have no idea what you’re going to make for dinner.

Days like this can make a woman feel very inept. But please believe me, we all have those days. Us normal moms do, anyways; some just hide it better than others.

We all have our days when it seems that we haven’t had a moment to sit down and rest, yet it looks as if nothing has been done around the home all day long! I know I’m not the only mom out there who has these days. (Somebody back me up on this one!)

It’s easy to be hard on yourself and dwell on all of the things that you meant to accomplish that day but didn’t get around to. But I want to challenge you to look at what you did accomplish throughout the day!

The kids were fed three meals, plus snacks (even if dinner was a slapped together PB&J, and applesauce dumped in a bowl), you changed their clothes, brushed their teeth, taught them their homeschooling lessons, watched them playing and read them a book. Diapers were consistently changed, a load of laundry was washed, the animals were fed, some gardening was done, the kids got their baths, and were lovingly tucked into bed at the end of a long day.

Tell me that’s accomplishing nothing! I always try to remind myself, too, that when my children are grown, they won’t remember the days when the house was a wreck. What they will remember are the times when I sat down and played a game with them, the special part of the day when I read to them from their favorite book, the silly way that I made their bologna look like a smiley face for lunch, or the song that I sang them as I tucked them into bed.

This is why we are stay at home moms. Not to be perfect in all that we do, and run a spotless home with no time to do anything but cook and clean all day long. We are home for our children. We are home so that we can be the one who kisses a scratched knee; we are the one who teaches our children to read, who witnesses baby’s first steps, and who teaches Christ, and right from wrong, through our own actions.

I guess I write this because today was that day for me. But I want to share this with another mother out there who may be feeling like a failure at times. You are a precious gift to your children, and your time is priceless. So what if your “to-do” list was completely lost today. Your children are happy, healthy, and blessed because of you.

Give yourself a break, and know that tomorrow is another day, and another opportunity to finish one of the never ending jobs that comes with motherhood.

The day will come when you will long to have your children distracting you from your household duties; cherish your time with them while they are young, and still near. You can run a spotless home another day.


Kendra
About Kendra 1103 Articles
A city girl learning to homestead on an acre of land in the country. Wife and homeschooling mother of four. Enjoying life, and everything that has to do with self sufficient living.

10 Comments

  1. A sincere thanks. Those days are only too numerous for me, and I’ve really started subscribing to the lie that I am a failure – seeing the truth brought tears to my eyes this evening.

  2. I was raised by a stay at home mom – and I’m so glad she did. She went “home” on mother’s day – still a young woman of 61. I know my sisters and nieces and nephew’s all cherish the time she spent with us. Even at 41, I have days where nothing seems to work. I have 3 at home, Kendra, 14, Vannan, almost 12, Joel, almost 4, and LaRue due in 20 weeks. I’m so glad I’ve stayed home with them – I’ve really not missed any milestone or accomplishment. I love to teach them new things for school and life. It is such a blessing to be a mom at home.

  3. This is an amazing post. I was blessed to be a stay-at home mom for only one year. Our financial situation has made it necessary for me to remain in the work force. Sadly, I still have the mentality of a stay-at-home wife and mother. I go to work every day and come home in the evening and try to get everything done that I would have if I had not gone to work. I sometimes feel like a failure when not everything gets completed. This was a great reminder that we all need to take a step back and look not at what was not done but at what we DID do. It truly is amazing. Thank you for this post.

  4. I have five children, 6 years old and under, and I home school the oldest two (first grade and kindergarten). Thank you for re-emphasizing something I needed to hear today! Some days I feel like a total failure because it seems like I never accomplish anything. My MIL once challenged me to make a list of the things I DO during the day, instead of making a list of things I need to get done and crossing off what I happen to finish. It really can be very encouraging to see what you actually accomplished (even though it doesn’t feel like much)!

  5. I also want to thank you for this post! Some days I wonder if I am doing the right things. Maybe I should just go back to work, put my daughter in day care, hire a maid and a nanny. Then I stop and think “That is so crazy! Why on earth would I want that kind of life?” That is not a life in my opinion! I once read a quote that went something like this, “Keeping the house clean while the children are growing, is like shovelling the snow while it’s still snowing.” It doesn’t make sense to do that, now does it?

  6. I was just telling my husband this yesterday, that I like challenges, but my challenges these days are different than they used to be. My challenges now usually revolve around getting all the laundry done in one day and put away, or getting all of the dishes washed even with a bunch of kids under foot. It may not solve world hunger, or make anybody a million dollars, but it’s important to me. When I get all of my to-do list done, I always feel like I really got something accomplished. Other people may poo-poo this, but staying home to take care of your home and raise children into good adults is imperative to me, and I’m proud of it, and feel blessed we’re able to swing it somehow financially.

  7. Wow! What a great post. In fact, I will say it’s one of your best. Please consider sending this to Dr. Laura. I’m not even a stay-at-home mom; I work and my husband stays home. Still, this post really touched my heart.

  8. My kids are 21 and 18 years old now. In alot of crazy ways, it seems that I was able to stay motivated and on task with household chores when they were young. I kept everything on a set schedule, even things like washing curtains, cleaning carpet, cleaning out closets, etc. Now I must be at an in between stage, sometimes Ive really let things go, not even realizing it. When they are young, it is mentally challanging to be a stay at home mom, but at my stage, its easier in a lot of ways, but sometimes I feel Im trying to find my place again. My mother always said you enjoy your kids more when they get older, and I always thought that sounded crazy, but its true. You young moms have alt of good things to look forward to.

  9. Kendra, thank you so much for this post–it means a lot to me, because I’ve been having an entire WEEK like this. I have a 4 1/2 year old, a 4 month old (who is ferociously cutting 4 teeth at once!) and I am almost 3 months pregnant! I had a very unproductive week this week, and one night was sitting, in tears, thinking “why do I even bother?” I was seriously condidering going back to work to escape the mess I have here, but then I came to my senses and realized that this rarely happens, but has before and I got through it! And it will happen again! God has blessed us to be stay-at-home moms, a blessing that could be taken away at any time due to our economic sitution right now. I watch my sister, a struggling single mom, and realize how fortunate I am, and I know I have no right to whine and complain when my day doesn’t go as planned. I’ve decided that when I have one of these days and I’m ready to blow, I will instead praise God for my kids, my family, my home and the blessing to be at home, managing the big circus!

  10. Thanks…just wanted to say this post was a blessing to me. I too have those days way too often lately! I know I need to be organized too though…as half my stress comes from my mess! I have been trying to remind myself of the same lately…love your blog btw…read it all the time 😉

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